Dear Strong Girl

I see you.

Do you hear me, Strong Girl?

I see you blinking away the tears you're not shedding until you're alone.  I hear you ask everyone else how they're doing and avoid answering that question for yourself.

And Strong Girl?  I know.  I know you've been through a lot.  You've learned how to cry silently, avoiding the need to burden anyone with your hurt.  You've tucked away your broken heart on more than one occasion and have smiled with your lips, but not your eyes.  You've carried the weight of the world on your shoulders and have refused to ask for help.

Because pain needs to be endured, not shared.  

At least, that's what we've been told.  Or that's what we believe.  Or, I don't know, somewhere along the line we became convinced that strength was synonymous with isolation.  If we needed help, if we broke and opened up and felt in front of another person, we were weak.  No one would take us seriously.  Everyone would just look at us with pity in their eyes.

Can I tell you something?

Being strong isn't all it's cracked up to be.

And I think you know it, Strong Girl.  In fact, I think you ache for someone to see your pain even when you're not willing to show it.  I think you desire to be known so deeply that someone can look at you with your fake smile and still ask what's wrong, someone who will not settle for the answer, "I'm fine."  I think, as much as you want to be strong, you want even more for someone else to be strong for you even if it's just for a moment.  Even if it's just long enough to catch your breath.

Because let's be real: this life is hard.  It's messy and it's fast and it doesn't take excuses from anyone.  Some days, it seems the only way to survive is to hide under the covers or stick your chin out and dare someone to cross you.  It's so easy to believe that being strong, being firm, being indestructible is the only way to make it in a world that wants to rip you apart.

But maybe it's possible that strength doesn't have to be callous.  Maybe it's possible that what you see as weakness is really just the door God has placed in front of you to embrace the community He has created around you.  Maybe, in order to know real strength, we have to lay down our ideas of being strong in exchange for His truth.  

Because Christ is pretty clear when He says, "My grace is sufficient for thee: for My strength is made perfect in weakness*."

If it seems like being the Strong Girl all of the time is exhausting and alienating, that's because it is.  You're occupying a job you were never meant to have.  And I get it.  Really, I do.  It's difficult to let go, to let yourself be free, to give yourself permission to feel however you feel when you feel it no matter who is or isn't around.  It's courageous to show weakness, even more courageous to let our God work through our weaknesses.  But Strong Girl?  I think you can be courageous.  

I think you're brave enough to loosen up.  I think you're brave enough to reach out, to encourage other Strong Girls around you to embrace His truth in their lives as well.  I think you're brave enough to believe Jesus when He whispers into your circumstances, "My grace is sufficient for thee."  

And Strong Girl?  You don't have to be strong, girl.  You can just be loved.

You can just be His beloved.

*2 Corinthians 12:9.